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What a day today. I had to work over to help cover that end of the month binge that the “powers that be” at the Pink Mafia perpetrate every month on us. It’s like they realize that they didn’t ship enough product as the month winds down and then schedule the bulk of it all on the very last day, and there I was stuck in the warehouse loading up 19 trucks today. It started off as just 14 {which would have been a record for me} and then extended into 16 before 10 o’clock had wound around. The “mystery” trucks showed up, or as my boss called them an “oops” but I have been on that end when they had the “oopses” for the guy that usually runs that show and know it is more of the giant popping sound of head coming out of ass. In reality it wasn’t that big of a deal but it is unnerving to say the least.

Then I have to deal with the soap opera of who is pissed off at who and why. Realistically the only attitude anyone I work with really should be is “show up, shut up, work, leave,” and that concept really doesn’t factor out with any of them. Yes it has a lot to do with why I can so brilliantly {shut up} turn the episodes of the Pink Mafia and Superdaddyman into interesting reading, but it also factors into why my life stinks too. The realism of it all sometimes interferes with good comedy and today happens to be one of those days, as I am sitting here listening to a wailing 14 year old above me. The fact of the matter is that it is 50 percent drama and 50 percent reality just like most of the things I write about but that is the realism of it because life is a drama. Unfortunately good drama has to be rooted in truth regardless.

I come home and my daughter wants me to let her go to the other side of Portsmouth to work on a school project with a friend of hers. They will be roughly a 20 minute drive away from here in one of the sections of the city that is a real ghetto. Now because it was the last moment which is how she operates I told her that she would have to have a phone number and an address to me by 5:00 and as I sit here at 5:30 typing this she hasn’t gotten these things and trying to amend the rules to it all because they don’t have a house phone there and she is waiting for her friend to call back on her cell phone. She doesn’t seem to understand that a cell phone is not a suitable alternative to a house phone, and also doesn’t seem to understand why I would feel that these things are needed, so I was forced to dredge up the last week for her. RECENT HISTORY!

First there was her progress report that she received two weeks ago that she hid from me. This was while she was working on being able to go to a concert with a friend from church and was mowing the lawn to get the money for it. While at the same time I just got word from the Futures program that she officially lost her scholarships that she had won in eighth grade because she is flunking out of school and won’t go to the appointments to talk to the Futures Chair. The lawn isn’t finished, but it has been finished twice in her mind despite the huge clumps of grass that are sticking up in the middle of the yard. If I point at them she pretends to take care of them, doesn’t and has a temper tantrum when you point them out again. I finally told her to go bring me the progress report that she has been pretending not to get or else and she does, and now she is upstairs crying on her bed because I don’t trust her. Sounds like a lot of drama to me, and partially a 14 year old girl that just doesn’t get it. The school has now demanded that she go to therapy, which is a good thing because no therapist would take her with just my asking because I have never found one that would say she needs it. UGH!

I would love to just take her into my job and show her around what hell looks like for a day and then afterwards point out to her that the way she is going she won’t even get a job as good as MINE! The sad part of it all is that she really is falling beyond anything that is even comprehendible to me. She knows better than anyone what the end results of how she treats life now are as she has the glowing example that her mother sets for her and she is at war with it whenever she see’s her. I still get rather perplexed at thinking that perhaps there are genetics at play here or she still looks at her mother and thinks “I can still survive while being useless” and at the moment I am just at a loss on it all.

I will keep you all updated though ;8o)

Want More Free Art? ...Visit the new angelis deZines on the web at www.jeremycrow4life.com/angelisdezines or check out my galleries at CherryTap

This is a repost of my writings from Itching For Coffee ... Where I often post writings with other talented writers ...

Now in the simplest terms I can put it, I can’t believe the gall of George W Bush today as he spoke on behalf of the Illegal Immigration bill that was put before congress granting amnesty to basically anyone that is in this country illegally. He very emotionally and eloquently lied to everyone when he stated that some people will try to scare everyone into thinking that it is an amnesty bill, but it just goes to show that they haven’t read it, and I find that offensive. I actually read it and what it states clear as a sunny day in the middle of the pacific ocean is that anyone who steps forward and can prove that they have been in the country for a specified {I say specified because that hurdle is still under negotiation} time will be granted “Legal Status” and that is amnesty pure and simple. Some people quibble about the length of time issue but if the government is unwilling to prove they are here now then that is merely a formality that can be worked around, and they know that.

Then there are the parts that he and the Democrats in congress are quibbling about being the pathway to citizenship that they are promoting as the actual bill but what it really is happens to be that part that makes it so you can become an actual citizen. You will pay a 5000$ fine and you will go back to your home country and wait in line to be a citizen, but that is if they WANT to be a citizen. Most of the illegal immigrants that we are talking about have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that they don’t want to be a citizen already. They won’t learn the language, respect the laws {like the law of stay the fuck out for example}, and they enjoy every benefit of being a dirty little secret {like free medical, not paying insurance, not going to jail when they drive without a license or even paying for people they harm when they do, etc etc ad infinitum} and the only thing they don’t enjoy is that minute percentage that they could get deported. Has anyone watched those 20,000 illegal immigrant rallies all over the country? I don’t see them exactly hiding either.

The inspired rage towards our president is not because I think he is evil, but I have finally been swayed to the belief that most of the Democrats have whined about for the better part of 6 years, and that being that he might be an idiot. My examples for this are simple as I watch his new found bravado on the one issue he has that I seriously hate, and sit around going “Where the hell was this when you should have been pushing the issues I cared about?” I mean he used to speak pretty good about the war in Iraq which I still support and I realize that that isn’t popular, but he has fought the war like a pussy and I am not to happy about that. People die in war and massive onslaught is the only way to enter into a war as we are there to kill people and break things, and his explanations of things these days are just corny at best. You dropped the ball George, and I am not happy about your new ball. I am a huge fan of defending the country and unlike all of the revisionists out there I don’t actually believe that Iraq was the only Middle Eastern country without terrorists but here we are as the left has dictated the argument so long that a lot of people do.

On that note let’s talk about Dubai. That was a great deal for America and a leader needed to lead the people of the country into understanding that. Dubai had all the resources to make our ports the greatest on the planet and would have. They have proven that their ports {which are most of the ports in the world mind you} are the safest and most secure on the planet, and they take their money really seriously. It actually would have been a slam dunk by uttering the simple phrase “Look it up for yourself,” and you didn’t. People like myself were left to defend you while you looked like an uneducated idiot. The tempo was dictated by people who knew nothing but the key words to scare everyone and make you look bad, and YOU let them. Again it’s about security right? Of course your plan to let upwards of 20 million people that have never been documented in their HOME country live here with a totally free pass because that is realistically all they want is what gets your passion? My new passion is getting rid of people like Ted Kennedy that has failed on illegal immigration 9 times in his too long in the senate, and you President Bush before you can help ruin it once out of Washington DC, and back wherever it is you two can fit in. This is not a “Party” issue because most of the morons on the illegal immigration issue are Democrats, and the big 2 idiots on the Republican side of the isle, Bush and McCain.

In less than 2 years when you walk out of the White House George {because he is not going to get impeached people, if you think he has done impeachable things then see a shrink} I will be applauding. There are things I like about you {thank you for the two justices you nominated I think they are top shelf} but there are too many things at this stage of the game I am embarrassed about. The way to do this is to absolutely barrage your congressmen and senators about how angry illegal immigration makes you and just hold down the fort until we can get a good president and a better house and senate. This includes making sure that John McCain doesn’t take your place because I didn’t like him the last time he ran and I really don’t like him now, but also making sure that I join the fray of people making your life hell until you leave. Mostly because your “new found” policies harm me, but also because I am vindictive that your once held policies are not as important as the new ones. If you don’t think so then I guess you didn’t read anything yourself buddy ;8o)

Want More Free Art? ...Visit the new angelis deZines on the web at www.jeremycrow4life.com/angelisdezines or check out my galleries at CherryTap

I guess its kinda getting harder to be cheerful around here these days, and I am starting to see too many things than what I can defend going on especially when they effect me so personally. I have thought for a while now that CherryTAP was nothing more than a science experiment with us all being the lab rats, but we could all find our way to make the place work for us. With that said I carved out my niche to the best of my ability and then I watched the CherryGODS collapse that all in on me slowly but surely. I coined the phrase that “CherryTAP will punish you for being a non fake” lately and everyday it appears to be so true as I watch it all.

I was joking with a friend that it appears that when you turn your back they do something else to make it more difficult on you as I was still pissed off about the attachments not working in Cherry Mail, and making my good deed of the weekend sheer hell. We actually deduced that while I was working too much and sick that week the whole system got changed in a way to force me to spend hours after fixing the attachment fuck up just to get some things back to normal. That new photo gallery system that was implemented during that week sucks and even worse then that it totally rearranged my photo galleries to a bad format. It also took away the “Ripped From” links on photos that were ripped from someone. Tough shit huh? Well it is when you based your existence on having talent as apposed to tits. Tough shit again I know but it doesn't mean I have to like it, I just have to live with it.

After spending the day fixing my photo galleries yesterday I sat back and watched the alerts and realized that more people come to my page and don’t rate anything then rate. Big deal huh? What makes you think you’re worth a rate anyway, but as a science experiment I went around to see that most of them took a skin, quite a few of them took a picture or two, not even bothering to rip it just right click save as because I never got a ripped from alert, and it’s just amazing what you learn when you get so jaded. I’m sure it doesn’t mean anything because I really have spent most of my time being an asshole anyway so why should I care, but it does actually get under your skin to see it all just get worse and you are part of the cause and not the cure by just sitting back and yawning through it. I was looking at things through rosey glasses then red ones and now I was just getting into a tether for no good reason.

Has anyone noticed that when someone gives up their VIC and then comes to your page after they had rated you an 11 it automatically re-rates you a 10? Not a big deal I suppose but does that mean that when you paid for your VIC it is blood money and has to be continued or else? I’m sure it doesn’t matter to anyone but me but it really seemed like another one of those little digs that the Rat Lab doles out to us. I actually was talking to a female friend that had a far more realistic view on CherryTAP then I had ever had when she said that “This place will force you to be a whore if you want to get anywhere, and it gets worse the further up the chain you go,” and that was for the most part a paraphrase from me but I am pretty sure she won’t correct the simplicity of how I put it. She did read this first and thought it was perfect so I will continue, but I’m not naming names or pointing fingers but it’s true because I see everyone either giving in to the way things are or giving up.

You either whore yourself in pictures, or soul around here or you go nowhere and I figured I had the tenacity to overcome that but another weekend of working around a fixed system is not in my future. I hated every second of being on CherryTAP this week and anything I did to try to make it better turned into a nightmare. Doesn’t have to be fair and doesn’t have to be righteous, just has to be said because I don’t like it anymore, and am willing to let Cherry go to the fakes, whores, frauds, middle school drama queens. cheats, bullies, and willing lab rats because the fact is that this place just makes me unhappy and whining about it is stupid. Defending it any longer is even stupider. With that said I also had an epiphany of sorts as I realized something rather dramatic yet so simple while writing this. CherryTAP is an online bar.

It makes me an idiot, to have thought it was or is or is ever going to be anything more than that. To be totally honest with you all, I had never seen it as actually being one so I am willing to play the dumbass here and simply say that the enhancements they make that make me miserable don't matter because this is not a place for writers or artists it is a bar. When they make their enhancements here it is not to accommodate me and they aren't being sneaky, they are making it more towards “their” vision of a stereotypical bar. That means whores working it for free drinks, frauds taking advantage of everyone's stupidity because their real lives suck, desperate men and totally drunken style creeps, and just about any sort of fake drama that marks the escapism that people hang out in bars for. I'm the idiot that has been treating a bar like a community and for that I apologize to all of you. What I really should be looking for is an online coffee shop.

Think of it this way if you are someone like me that never took an Ibuprofen until he was 30 years old because you thought it was a joke and then thought you had discovered a wonder drug because it made your toothache go away then you don't exactly see things for what they are. It makes you look like a moron because “everyone knows that an Advil will relieve pain” but seriously here folks, I didn’t! This is the same thing where in they have said all along that this is a BAR and it operates just like a bar! See a bulletin from a well known Godmother whining about how everyone should never downrate because it is in poor taste even though everyone knows she is a notorious downrater? Well of course! It’s a bar and people lie in bars and everyone just accepts it and she has enough friends that most of them don’t know that and will repost her propaganda because it is just bar gossip anyway! See that person that pretends to be the most helpful person here but everyone should be able to see that they are a whiner and that equates to helping for some reason? Well of course! It’s a bar, and people whine into their beers in a bar and other people who don’t know any better think that they are part of the “in crowd” because they are always there and whining looks smart to some people! See that drama queen pretending to be a woman even though they are really a man? Everyone appears to treat them like they are God even though half of them are just in on the scam? Well of course! It’s a bar and there are lots of people who look up to the master manipulators in a bar because they aren’t smart enough to think for themselves and manipulation equals smart! DUH???? Jeremy is a moron, and not the people that are acting like what the place is! A Bar, not an art gallery or a museum, a BAR!

This floats in so many directions though realistically and can be used for just about any question anyone has. You don’t like the NSFW rules on CherryTAP? Well listen dipshit, it’s a bar and there are decency rules in any public place. Now listen to part two though as any bar still needs to have whores that will put out after they have had a few to be a successful bar right? Some of these places will have a little back room where the guys can take the women they liquored up and get what they need and CherryTAP is a bar after all right? Sure it doesn't benefit the guys that have things considered NSFW but horny guys will always show up at a bar so fuck ya, we don't need ya! That’s why just being female is going to get a pile of men saying lewd things to you in a shout box, because it is a bar and this is the behavior we expect in a bar right? Sure you can turn it off but if you want to be popular you better learn to play the game right?

Think of it this way but whores are the women that come right in and start posting the filthy images of themselves, but its more like prostitution when you give in to doing that so that you can be popular right? Hey it’s a bar! You have to play like it’s a bar and don’t worry the admin is right there to steer it in that direction no matter what you do anyway. Who needs a lot of photo galleries because you just need two anyway so if they ruin the galleries you had then it’s your own damn fault. You need the one with the public pictures that are just sexy enough to get the people to desperately want to look at the other one with the private pictures right? It’s a bar damnit! This is how some people obviously see bar life and the place will be molded into that one way or another anyway and again I am the moron who thought it wasn’t a bar. Stupid Jeremy!

You want more evidence that I and a lot of people here are idiots because it is, after all a bar, but do you go into a bar and leave your things lying around? Well of course you don’t and if you do you need help because they get stolen. Bitching about it is just plain stupid and makes you a dupe for any old con man that will sell you the beleif that there is security, but like a lot of them actually are doing is conning you into leaving your stuff around so they can steal it to. That is after all the policy here and some people think that profiles should be private. If you don’t like a bar leave the bar moron! Well here I and a lot of other total morons actually think that when we make things and leave them on CherryTAP that there is some rule of etiquette that needs to be followed and realistically things in bars that are left in plain sight without a hand attached to them get STOLEN! Duh??? Again, Jeremy is an idiot because this is just a bar!

It’s simple as, my skins, my art, my creations, my writing, my everything doesn’t belong here if I expect respect with it because it is a bar. If you don’t want your pictures stolen then don’t leave them around a BAR! Sure there are more people that have respect then not but that number slowly dwindles as the good people leave, and they are leaving. I have been watching it. I accept that there is no reason to have the “Ripped From” links anymore because it is a bar and if I was smart then I would be hanging out in a place where that stuff belongs. The good news and the bad news is that I know that it is just a bar now, and when I hang out here I will start treating it as such and I suggest that anyone else who gets aggravated by the way things are going do the same, or find somewhere else to be because like most bars it either gets old or it gets you. Cheers doesn’t exist people. I know because I live by it, and even if you watched that show, half of the fun of watching it was that you knew realistically that they were all losers but funny losers ;8o)

Want More Free Art? ...Visit the new angelis deZines on the web at www.jeremycrow4life.com/angelisdezines or check out my galleries at CherryTap

When last we met our brave young space hero Crowsis had just found his world yet again under attack by Darth Mad Shitter, and his world was being invaded by the many other nemesis that plague Deep Space Pink Mafia. You may remember the guidance of his Kaipod Owly Wahn Kayummy to “Use the Force” which loosely translated into Planet Oz terminology mean “Fuck with their heads” and Crowsis looks to her guidance in the art of evilling during times like this. It really shouldn’t be too hard as the Idiotan culture around PMHQ allows for the easy beguiling of it’s inhabitants, but the plan went sort of like this.

Crowsis used his cunning ability to stare someone in the face and feed them a line of shit for the betterment of all to pull off the deed. This is a tactic that one learns when his mother is a failed soap opera diva back on the home planet of Disfunxia! He of course started at the most feeble areas of the space station where all of the stoned “under twenties” spent most of their time because they would be the most easily swayed with simple Jedi Mind tricks. “Yeah so they have finally taken samples of the shit and are doing DNA testing on it and matching it up with all of the random drug screening samples,” which of course struck home with these inhabitants as they had already forgotten who stayed strait for that month to supply all the samples.

The looks of abstract terror on all the younger Idiotans as they were convinced one by one that Darth Shitter was going to be found out through the use of science {not their best subject} had most of them chattering amongst themselves. They were probably most terrified that there would be another round of random drug screenings and they had no time to prepare for them at all! This made it easier for Crowsis to simply allow the cancer of gossip to do its evil little job throughout the space station, and hopefully find its way to the real Darth Mad Shitter and perhaps force him to give himself away. The fact that he now had 20 space junkies searching for his ass because they think he has sunk them should go a long way too. One could only assume that anyone that smears their own feces all over everything probably is a bit more feeble minded then most, but then again the tale has been told of those that simply put their own hands in it afterwards, and never appear to learn either. It appears to be a real Darwin project out here in Deep Space after all.

Throughout more transmissions {powered by Nextel} with Owly Wahn Kayummy Crowsis was able to watch from afar as the evil plot took its grip on everyone. Simply entering the Promenade while a bunch of Idiotans were congregating would create instantaneous silence that showed that the plan was appearing to spread through osmosis. One would actually start assuming that there has been a gang of Darth Mad Shitters in a form of “Monkey See Monkey Do” by the way several people simply couldn’t maintain eye contact on the Space Station today. Again the fear of another round of random drug screenings aside, Grand Nehgis George {who should have known better as he would have been told by the Station authorities personally} started getting into the act himself as he started entering rooms by loudly proclaiming “Well it won’t be long now boys before we have that shit smearing bastard!”

Along those lines it started getting rather late in the day by the time Crowsis had the entire Station talking about DNA tests on shit but it happened and people were finally starting to approach Crowsis to ask him if it was true or not. He stood his ground and used “The Force” with all of the skill and cunning he could muster throughout the entire day, until it was simply common knowledge throughout the Idiotan community. Of course as the buzz went throughout the Space Station there appeared to be one person that it didn’t effect as much as everyone else, and that would be Darth Mad Shitter because the evidence never did start coming forth as to who the person actually was. The Dark Side of the Force was strong in whomever it is, let me tell you! Of course it could actually be someone on the other shift like the evidence always led to but heaven forbid that the facts get in the way of a great plan to Crowsis anyway! Just watching all the junkies around here walking around all paranoid was reward enough for our renegade space cowboy anyway. By the time the upper management … um … Space Overlords went around with the true information Crowsis would be long gone in the Starship Ford Focus anyway, and thanks to the power of “The Long Weekend” most of these guys will have forgotten that they had been lab rats all day.

Of course the last laugh is rarely owned by Crowsis as he finds himself decontaminating the “Throne Room” several more times throughout the last leg of the day for the Deep Space Septic System doesn’t ever appear to work this time of year, and more of the water from the space urinals end up on the floor then down the drain. The fact that Idiotans like to play in floor water while Crowsis tries to sop it up doesn’t help either, but also makes him feel more content in treating them like Lab Rats. Should he ever actually find out who Darth Mad Shitter is then he will be using him to mop up the floor despite his amazing Jedi Training, but as he is doing it he will use a lot of Force. ;8o)

Want More Free Art? ...Visit the new angelis deZines on the web at www.jeremycrow4life.com/angelisdezines or check out my galleries at CherryTap

It wasn’t a bad night after all but I had promised the youngest daughter that I was going to take her out for something really special tonight because I had to miss the Daddy/Daughter dance last weekend. Those who didn’t know I was so gravely ill last week that I couldn’t talk {and those saying it was a blessing … bite me} and was more concerned with contaminating the parents at the dance. Kids as any parent knows deserves it for all of the diseases they bring home to us. Having come off of a very difficult work week and the exhaustion didn’t help either. Well it stands to reason that I promised her that she would get a date tonight and like any 6 year old with her daddy, she never left me forget it all week. They never seem to remember the things that don’t benefit them do they?

I asked her what she wanted to do and she chose “A Restaurant with a real waitress,” so I determined that that meant Pizza Hut. Around here they are pretty fancy places really as they are called “Pizza Hut – Real Italian Bistro” so we got dressed up a bit and picked on the other two as they were going to stay home and eat cooking from a woman that is half Scottish and half British {Food looks God awful and smells really bad but fortunately has no flavor whatsoever} while we were going out! I am going to contrast this to my last real date that I had which involved a dinner just so that everyone can get a good idea of what I am talking about here.

My date tonight was excited and ended up running out and waiting 15 minutes in the car until I finally dragged my lazy ass out there to leave. My last real date {blind} the woman in question came out complaining like mad because I had brought the Minivan instead of the Eclipse, and did that the entire drive to the restaurant. This date couldn’t keep her hands off of me as she hugged me every few minutes to remind me that she loved her daddy. The last date sat at the table and didn’t shut up until well after the meal was served and the entire topic was about how she hated children. Would have been somewhat tolerable if she hadn’t actually known I was a single father with 3 kids. This dinner cost me 15.85 for Pizza two salads, a Pepsi, and a coffee, and after the tip came to a whopping 22 dollars even. That date cost me somewhere in the ballpark of 70 dollars, I can barely remember what I ate but my “date” got pretty drunk, and wasn’t exactly a “happy” drunk.

The last real get out and go to dinner date ended after dinner as I finally took her drunken, mouthy ass home after she started complaining because I had tickets to go see “Fiddler on the Roof” and she thought plays were stupid. I then went and picked up my best friend who happens to be a lesbian and she spent the better part of the night trying to find me another date to replace the last one. This dinner ended with my daughter thinking up anything she possibly could to just stay out longer so the two of us went to the beach and took photos of all kinds of different things with the camera phone and sent them out to Australia. The whole way home she ecstatically thanked me for the greatest night of her 6 years on earth. She then proceeded to show the pictures to her great grandmother since she figured out how to use the phone media player and passed out with a smile on her face from all the excitement about a half an hour before her bedtime.

I guess the long and the short of it all is that I am finally getting better at this whole “dating” thing and with that I would like to point out to anyone out there that there is hope for any of us after all. Have a great Memorial Day weekend everyone ;8o)

Conclusion to MAP Trek tomorrow … been a really busy day if you couldn’t tell ;-)

Want More Free Art? ...Visit the new angelis deZines on the web at www.jeremycrow4life.com/angelisdezines or check out my galleries at CherryTap

Stardate a1anda2-69 Captains log USS Pink Mafia ... It was a rather bright and warm day for deep space as the USS Ford Focus docks itself to the diabolical space station PMHQ {Pink Mafia Headquarters} deploying our brave young super hero .. um .. space crusader Crowsis to another day of deep space reorganization. Upon entering the promenade of the space station the usual utterance of orders from the inhabitants {Idiotans} of the last outpost {oh trust us on that one} along the black hole of life was that there had been an attack by an old nemesis of Crowsis. The darkest of evil in Deep Space PMHQ at that, for his ability to attack without provocation or logical end games rivals that of Imtoocutus of Borg! This fiendish space trash known as The Mad Shitter … um … Darth Mad Shitter, has been an uknown entity for as long as Crowsis has been patrolling this quadrant of deep space! Such news always comes with a cringe to Crowsis as he knows that it means a good hard round of decontamination that is never any fun. Never fear boys and girls there always is amusement at these times assuming you have a strong stomach.

It was at the gateway of “Throne Room” where Darth Mad Shitter usually strikes our hero Crowsis denotes that the giggling of certain Kings and other nare do wells must be met with certain caution as he never knows if it is an opportunity to do harm or get harm. The first on the scene of course was Darth Taco as he can never stray to far from anything that potentially can create embarrassment or even slight discomfort to Crowsis. Darth Mad Shitter for those who have not been following along is a secretive pile of space trash that likes to use their own fecal material as a weapon and with great effectiveness. Upon placing their own defecation on their fingers they then frolic throughout the “Throne Room” smearing it on all of the handles to the toilets ... um ... thrones, faucets and doors. Many an Idiotan has assumed that this is a way to get under the skin of Crowsis as he is forced to deal with the clean up operations and Darth Taco of course is one of them. Most know though that Darth Taco rarely thinks about anything before he assumes though.

“So you mean to tell me that you think Darth Mad Shitter is out to get me?” Crowsis asks Darth Taco while his maniacal giggling continues as he watches Crowsis get the decontamination supplies, “I mean it is gross and it pisses me off and all, but you and everyone else are the ones who come in here and put your fingers all over the contaminated areas. You then of course don't wash your hands and then shove food in your mouths all night well before you even find out that you have had your fingers in someone’s shit,” and after watching Darth Taco turn the right shade of green adds at the end, “I put on blue gloves whenever I come in here and I have the decontamination stuff to put on my hands when I am done, and you seem to think that it is funny now that you know about it, well after the fact?” With that he watched Darth Taco run into the “Throne Room” to use the “Thrones” with the opposite end of his body. The moron will probably flush after and not even bother to wash his hands still.

Of course even after everyone found out about Darth Mad Shitter, not one person bothered to clean it off themselves. As they always do they whined about it, told about a third of the Idiotans that were patrolling the space station, and simply let the other two thirds keep sticking their fingers in crap. Yep, Crowsis really got the worst of this didn’t he as he had to clean it up with his gloves on, and the proper decontamination equipment? Again Crowsis wishes Darth Taco a wonderful day and asks him if he remembered to wash his hands after sneezing with both his hands over his face. Darth Taco says the customary “Fuck You!” {Idiotan for “Have a nice day”} and disappears to his star cruiser the USS Isuzu Trooper to leave star dock for the night as he had only waited around assuming that he could have a laugh at Crowsis. Crowsis thought that was very nice of him to have that laugh.

As Crowsis was decontaminating the “Throne Room” he could hear the faint and distant voice of the mentor that had taught him the art of evilling, “Use the Force Crow!” and his mind was trying to get a grasp on the meaning. “Use the Force Crow!”

“Could this be some sort of sign that I know how to catch Darth Mad Shitter if I use the evilling skills that Master Owly Wahn Kayummy has instilled in me all these years?” Crowsis started thinking to himself until he heard the faint voice again “Use the Force Crow!” and that made him think to look down at his communicator {powered by Nextel} and realized that he was just getting communications from her. Good he was about to tell the voices to shut up and get back in the Tales of Tease blogs where she belongs, this is a Star Trek rip off and there are too many Star Wars clones invading it as there is. The union is going to be pissed off after all! {Mental Note – Better do one of those Tales of Tease blogs pretty soon *drools* so that Owly Wahn can be featured properly!}

Seriously though it is the fact that Owly Wahn Kayummy comes from the far off planet of Oz makes her the perfect Kaipod to teach Crowsis how to use true Jedi mind fucking abilities on the simpletons that inhabit Deep Space PMHQ. {I can hear the words of encouragement from Master Kayummy now that sounds rather like “Bite Me Crow!” as she reads of her wonderful role in today’s tale} In all reality she could sell these morons shit and tell them it is candy bars and they would be repeat customers, and her ability to evil is delicious … um … awe inspiring! With that said the light bulb went off over the head of young Master Crowsis {damnit we totally lost the Trek to Wars barrier didn’t we} and he was off to start perpetrating the very Jedi Mind control stunts that it would require to pull off The Search for Darth Mad Shitter!

Will young Master Crowsis finally defeat Darth Mad Shitter? Will Owly Wahn kick the ever loving shit out of him for talking about her in a blog? Will he forget about this stupid story and simply write another Tales of Tease instead? Will he ever be able to write one of these stupid things and keep it Star Trek based and get off of the cheap laughs of Star Wars gags? Will this Batman style ending ever end? … Find out in the next exciting edition of MAP Trek III – The Search for Shytter! In other words … To Be Continued

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Oh sick and poisoned soul from mind I see the ruination of self

Cold desperate disheartened and feeble are my closed intentions

Dispassionate ailing that finds way to stew the churning melodramatic crazed hate

Can I trust my own head or should I wish it turned off?

Trust is not found in the places that the answers scream for they are never the same or few

Farthest out crying withering pools of putrid black water from which to drink

The only places that my own center would wish to rest old, withered, dying

What the hell have I to expect as my only friend, my rival, my enemy rests within, and hates me with more venom then the harshest of critics

The noises won't turn off

Self medicating hatred that festers and boils with no outlet, too far, too few

No you can not escape who you are, what you are, you just are

Deathly ill the sick poison courses the veins and takes whole what only fights weakly to denounce your very own right to exist, to be happy, to be free

Without the sounding there is no sweet, no friendly, no happy, no hope

Who Knew?

I knew

Beyond the door there is no salvation, no light, no hope, and playful voices are what draw me to that place with no core, no light

Again within the dark confines of the scariest place known I feel, I hurt, I cry

Despite the fear, the anxiety, the chaos, the enemy, the fool, the me, within

There is no hope, eyes open, fists clenched, teeth grinding, mind fighting back, chaos, torment, hopeless anxiety with fear and loathing like song from the sirens that tortured brave Ulysses, Odysseus, Poseidon, Hades, hate, anger, less than

Nothing

To release one must be willing to grow and who knows when anyone is ever ready for that

I always think I am anyway

Who knew?

I knew

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This is a repost of my writings from Itching For Coffee ... Where I often post writings with other talented writers ...

Friends, Americans, Countrymen … Lend me your ear! I have come to bury Bush, not praise him, and I am sure that is what quite a few people are usually trolling the newswire to hear these days. Realistically speaking I am sure that quite a few people have thought me to be the man’s water boy over the last 6 years and realistically I am not. Quite frankly I can’t stand the man’s politics but I also have a very bad habit of living in the real world, and most of his hard core detractors quite possibly never have. Reality often gets mired by what mud people can throw and how the perceptions bandy about, but let’s get one thing strait here that a lot of people still don’t get their fingers around, and that is that he is still better than the two clowns he ran against.

If I were to go back 6 years to the election of Bush the first time around I like to remind people that as it has been proven a million times that Gore lost Florida, there were other pieces to that puzzle that should have been looked at and of course are not. I have to deal with these issues a lot here in New Hampshire and the revisionism is on overload right now as for the first time in my lifetime the entire state’s political structure is “officially” Democrat controlled. I put it that way because as the borders of New Hampshire have been inundated with people escaping the messes they had made in Massachusetts, Maine, and Vermont for decades and if you look at the voting habits here we have elected Democrat’s for president for 20 years aside from the first election of G.W. Bush and those 4 Electoral College votes that Clinton and Kerry got no matter what would have made Florida a moot point.

The dirty little secret on that little fiasco is playing itself out in spades right now as you see the great savior of the human race “Al Gore” running around forcing flawed environmental policy down our throats. That is the man he always was but most people won’t admit that that was what he was back then. He ran an excellent shell game during his campaign but the typical New Hampshire voters saw through all of his “environmental” apologizing and saw the entire state losing its lumber industry and having to support thousands of people incapable of working elsewhere. Simple economics dominated that discussion here but nobody talks about it because it wasn’t “sexy” like the whole Florida Chad crap.

Well we are at a crossroads again here in the state of New Hampshire which are pangs of reaction to that political retard that we have in the White House instead of the two bigger retards that ran against him. In the last election cycle the House and the Senate were taken by the Democrats on a national level as we all know but here in New Hampshire for the first time in over 100 years the “Live Free or Die” state was completely taken by the Democrats as well. It was a bit different though as the state is leaning harder left every year with the influx of people from across the borders. Every year more people leave the bordering states, because it is too hard to live there, and they never realize that they are the reason that those states were messed up. They simply think that New Hampshire can run as it does, and still have the social “mommy” state status that made them feel good where they left. The Democrats that have been running through the laws of this state like a bunch of retarded Bulls in China Shops.

The newest one that just got initiated by the state house is the mandatory seat belt law. Now they don’t even have the tenacity to lie to all of us like all the other states do when they enforce a mandatory seat belt law for everyone. I call it lying because when you say one thing and it “always” changes and you damn well know it then that it lying. Most seat belt laws always start off as “secondary violation” and then always go to “primary enforcement” so I am pretty secure in saying that, but in this instance it is going to be “primary enforcement” from the get go. I realize to a lot of you that the seat belt laws seem like a really stupid thing to get a beef about but not in my eyes as you have to use traditional “liberal” lying to get it going in the first place, and then the lying about every angle of it has to be full bore through the entire process. It always starts with “It costs the state less money” and “It’s about saving lives” and then always steamrolls from there. What it is really about is keeping law enforcement from going after real crime {which Democrats hate enforcement of} and making sure that the police departments are out there racking up easy profits {which Democrats truly adore} while never really having to get dirty.

Here’s where I have my issues in it all, and I will apply the whole denomination of “common sense” to it all that I would truly hope that everyone would like to learn to use. In your average automobile accident where a seat belt is not worn over the speed of 35 mph the person who is not wearing their seatbelt dies. Sometimes it can be really messy, and might require a lot of cleaning equipment, but these things are on hand at every accident anyway. The body is then placed in a body bag {even after being scrubbed out of the pavement or bridge abutment or whatnot} and then it is taken to wherever they put dead bodies in whatever community until the family claims responsibility. Most of the cost of this is incurred regardless of whether people survive or not in the accident. These facts are rather hard to deny when common sense is applied.

Now in the average accident above 35 mph where a seat belt is worn {and of course under say 100 mph, lets not be silly here} the person wearing the seatbelt will most likely survive assuming that something rather strange doesn’t happen like they are decapitated by a steel girder or something. In any case under most circumstances it is nice that the person is alive but a lot of the time they end up with injuries and quite often they are catastrophic. Shattered glass in your face, fires, broken ribs from the seatbelt, concussions, shattered legs, broken necks, etc etc etc happen and this requires some real cash from the state to deal with. Ambulances and helicopters and various rescue vehicles are merely the beginning. Most of these people will become a ward to Medicaid and often will never be employable again. A large portion of them will retain hospital bills in the millions of dollars and it FAR outnumbers the amounts of people who somehow survive without the seatbelt and are that messed up. Sorry to break it to everyone but that is common sense.

You then have to deal with phase two of the whole argument which is the fact that it saves lives. This is a wonderful argument in MY opinion but I happen to be a Pro-Life, Pro-God, Second Amendment, Right Wing Whacko, so that would kinda fit my policy now wouldn’t it? I also happen to believe in true freedom of self will, and that is where I have my issues with any sort of law that is imposed to protect me from me, because it is really a law to protect my free will from becoming an issue, and that is where the “other” side of the isle often comes into account. Let us analyze their usual motives in these sort of things. Take abortion for instance, since that happens to be a “woman’s right to do whatever the hell they want to with their bodies” and would sort of fit the bill of what a motor vehicle driver would want to do with their body. Again as we are talking about what constitutes a “life” or not, or who has control over what they want to do with their body I must say that abortion is the only one of the two that guarantees that a human being will be dead. Again it is a perception problem I think as we look at who seems to think a human being is dying? In all reality it doesn’t matter but it still seems to lend credence to lying.

This piece of crap bill added to the one they just passed banning smoking in all restaurants {and as I point out at least our Lunatic Left is a bit more honest where they simply came right out and are banning it in bars too instead of waiting for the dust to clear on the lying to begin with} and we have the makings of the “Live Free or Die” state losing its character all together. Like the “mommy” states around us guns would be next if they had more time, but they don’t. The ticking clock that is leading towards finally getting that “Illegal Immigrant” humping moron out of the white house is also the same due date for all of these clowns jobs to be reaffirmed as well. Like the last two year span that all branches of New Hampshire government was controlled by the Democrats this one is meeting the same end by rampant greed to effect change too quickly. With that I say, “Thank God” before they outlaw that in this state too ;8o)

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What a week I just endured. There is only one thing that can make a totally poverty stricken father who had entered into an agreement to work 5 ten hour days in a row which were going to be hectic and busy all the way feel any worse. It happened too as about half way through day one I started getting the worst sore throat I had ever had and a cough that wouldn’t go away. My mornings were shortened up by my desperate attempts to get my coughing under control and a trip to Wallgreens to buy another slew of medications to try and quell the coughing. In the end nothing worked and I am sitting here on Saturday morning coughing my fool head off after working an eleven hour day yesterday, but thank God I have two days off and it’s all over for now in the working onslaught department.

I’m pretty sure that it was my working conditions that did it to me actually as the “other” warehouse that I usually work in about 6 hours a week was my prison for 41 of the last 51 and the place is so dusty that the floor moves when you look at it. I never had allergies growing up but it appears to be another one of the wonderful things that the Chicken Pox left behind on me six years ago when the Zoster Pneumonia almost took me. Since then I have had hay fever and allergic reactions to so many things it is startling and takes me by surprise. When you lived 31 years without allergies then it is a learning process to say the least. The only bright side to all of this is that I haven’t thrown my back out from all the coughing, but I have probably just jinxed myself with that one.

Now with the misery index all in check I can get on to the good news where I had gotten a pay increase for my upgraded job capacity and eleven hours of overtime on top of that I should be able to catch up on all the bills that took me by surprise this year. That’s a good thing especially considering that my usual out plan {meaning my father} had his own misery quotient this year and was unable to help. It was hard not to fall into some sort of funk over it all but so far there has been a feeling of accomplishment as it all has fallen into place quite interestingly if not for the sacrifice of my physical well being. I was contracted for a few editorials for a couple of different websites as well so that should keep me from having to do this again for a while. We shall see as it is in this neck of the woods everyone’s dream come true as I am left incapable of talking, and the forecast is calling for rain all weekend which means the kids will be trapped inside all weekend too. This should be interesting.

I guess the really hard thing to figure out right now is how I spend my time. I was on CherryTAP a whole 2 hours for the entire week and just went 48 hours without logging in at all, and didn’t really miss it. There were people I missed but realistically going through everything and looking around as much as I did was a lesson in futility, and I kinda enjoyed being without the drama. Natural progression when you are anywhere for any length of time I suppose. I started paying more attention to my e-mail groups with my free time and even started tagging again and it made me feel a lot better or at least more productive. I think I will ease back into the whole CherryTAP thing and see if I can find a happy medium. Life is too short after all and I found myself back in a romance that once had died off, but never really did and have made myself the promise that I am going to dedicate my time to it as I always had to all of my online popularity crusades. I owe her that much or I need to understand that I never truly deserved her to begin with. This is the more “mortal” me that I learned to deal with this week.

Now I am going to be back to tagging pages and figuring out who is posting the important bulletins, reading more blogs and spending time on here with the people that matter while weeding out the rest of the drama queens I haven’t gotten rid of yet. I think seeing the sheer glee in everyone over the demise of one of the polarizing figures on CherryTAP and was left with that bad taste in my mouth of “who’s next?” because they can’t live in a hate free vacuum for too long. It’s part of their shtick, and I am not going to dive into the sand box anymore. It’s not worth my time that should be dedicated to better things. At least that is what I am telling myself now ;8o)

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It was a shortened weekend for everyone’s favorite super villain turned super hero, as his responsibilities of keeping an eye on the dreaded Pink Mafia were extended another day last week. This of course made it hard for the Caped Pervader to properly do his due diligence to his other duties protecting the fair maidens of Megolopolis {which was sheer torture on him as the weather dictates even shorter skirts} and of course keeping the Terrorist Organization Known as the Evils’s {TOKE} under control! Now of course this is not completely impossible when you have the keen intellect for evil like the Superdaddyman does, but of course it would appear daunting to mere non super heroes, we’re sure.

Now of course as the Superdaddyman had found himself in the halls of the dreaded Pink Mafia Headquarters {PMHQ} for a good deal of the day on Saturday that gave ample time for TOKE to plot with the other terrorist organization headed by the fiendish Greektradgedius Inyiddish {GTIY} also known as Mophaka Al Queholic {MAQ} and no good can ever come of that. The Superdaddyman found himself committed to many Mother’s Day festivities the next day before he had even escaped the PMHQ and was none to happy about it. How could anyone not want to be involved with Mother’s Day festivities one may ask? Well this comes from the loosest interpretation of the word as in the family of Superdaddyman a “Mother” can either mean the person who gave birth to you, and also mean the other variant and realistically it is both regardless of who the “Mother” is.

First off there was to be a shin dig at the ol’ Casa Di Evils’s which is no way that the Superdaddyman is going to want to spend his only day off from Pink Mafia babysitting, but was already a forgone conclusion at this point anyway. Then there was the usual question that usually comes up from one of the Evils’s which would be “Can we call the Mother of all the Evils’s” {MAE} which always forces Superdaddyman to come up with some lame excuse that would be proven wrong when she finally called herself. Yes this is another one of those “Could be a Mother” – Could be a Mutha” moments as MAE has had two different addresses and at least two different phone numbers since the last time they saw her. This would be the last time when Lazius Boycrazius was pulled off of her throat. In any event there is nobody at the Casa Di Evils’s that even knows how to contact her.

The last time the Evils’s were in contact with MAE {aka the choking incident} was enough to make them dread the day thinking that the Superdaddyman would force them to talk to her. This worked to the Superdaddyman’s advantage as they stayed out of sight for most of the day until MAE must have been reminded by someone {probably whatever guy she is sleeping with now} that she has children and ended up calling on her own power. This is a good sign actually as the Superdaddyman looks at it for it signifies that she probably found a man with a job who can actually pay a phone bill. The sun has to shine on a dog’s ass every once in a while. The last 3 or 4 didn’t have a job so this actually is a big step up for her. It did not sit too well with Lazius Boycrazius as Greektradgedius Inyiddish handed her the phone and demanded that she talk to MAE. It became apparent about 20 or so seconds into the conversation that Lazius Boycrazius was simply giving her the yup yups.

This is where the Superdaddyman come’s on as he pointed out to her that it would probably be better if she were to give the phone to one of the other two criminal masterminds so that they can talk. Without even the decency of saying it out of the earshot of MAE on the other end she stated, “I am trying to kill off the minutes on her calling card to try to spare the other two, she’s just babbling on about a new tattoo again,” and with that the Superdaddyman could clearly hear on the other end of the phone that he was being paged. This is never good, and will require a bit of privacy you see.

The Superdaddyman took the phone out onto the front porch of the Casa Di Evils’s to listen to a long incoherent rant about how he has taught the evils’s to disrespect her. Superdaddyman has learned to let her get it all ut of her system while he gives her the yup yups {trick he learned from Lazius Boycrazius as a matter of fact} and then when she gets sick of arguing with herself she will usually give a pause for the Superdaddyman to interject something that has a 14% chance of getting through. Speaking out of place brings the chances down a bit to 0%. She really was letting him have it pretty good too because her voice was actually changing tones, or so he thinks he remembers it, but when the pause came up the Superdaddyman was poised with his short and concise point that he was going to try to get across before the screaming started again. “You only talk to them once a month for about 15 minutes and it is all about something frivolous you did, and they tend to want to tell you about themselves and you never have time for that,” and she was off again!

It’s rather sad that she will never see it actually but she will never see it actually. The Superdaddyman did give her about 5 years to try to grasp the concept of being a parent and she at this point is simply losing the years that she has left to be one. Lazius Boycrazius has had to deal with becoming a teenager without the benefit of a mother and the concept caught on quickly and there was nothing that the Superdaddyman was going to do to make it any better on her. Two psychiatrists now have both told the Superdaddyman that it will do nobody any good to continue to try unfortunately and the only learning process that anyone can hope from that is that she will at least take the opportunity to use her mother as a negative power of example. It still makes the Superdaddyman sad to see it, but it also makes him a bit more at ease knowing that Lazius Boycrazius is figuring these things out on her own and perhaps has a better defense mechanism than even the Superdaddyman because she simply closed it down instead of fighting it out with her now. It’s not exactly healthy but it isn’t exactly sick either.

On a lighter note the other “Mother” could be listed as “Mutha” called her son {by birthright and not by choice} after the evils’s had gone to bed. This is never a good scene as the Superdaddyman wasn’t exactly blessed with a wonderful woman to call “mother” either and many a blog entry has been dedicated to how he feels about her and quite frankly was NOT happy when GTIY brought the phone down to him either. “So how are you doing, are you getting any writing done? I found one of your articles on the internet and I was so proud of you!” was how the conversation opened up which was a definite shock to the Superdaddyman’s system and totally caught him off guard even. About 20 minutes he had lost all track of time as he was telling her about the three novels and two screenplays that he had been working on. Again she rather floored him as she listened rather intently to what he was saying and even interjected a good pointer here and there, as she already is an established writer.

It wasn’t until the Superdaddyman had been prattling on about himself for that whole 20 minutes that he thought to ask her how she is doing, and she responded by saying, “I’m doing good, I’m happy that my son has turned into a fine man, a good father and a wonderful artist of many talents, so that is all I could ever hope for on Mother’s Day,” which just about made the Superdaddyman speechless. Rather than asking her questions about her medications or some other passive aggressive comments that he usually would interject during a moment like this he managed to just say thank you. What he spent the rest of the night thinking about though realistically is that there might still be hope for the evils’s and their mother, but it just might take another 23 years. ;8o)

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The Twins of Kane – Exodus 2.6

“I don’t know what you’re talking about mom?” he said to me rather stunned. Just based on the face value of it all, I would have to assume that he is telling the truth because it’s hard to express the look on his face which is definitely of a young man that is realizing that his mother may be insane. It’s pretty hard to fake actually. “I haven’t been close to her at all, and I think I should probably call the sheriff in here or something because you’re really starting to scare me mom,” he said through a rather shaky voice.

“Do that Jake, call the police, you’re mother is going to kill me!” Mary spoke up despite the lack of breath she was suffering from, “Hurry!”

“I’m not deaf Mary, I was listening to you two from upstairs,” he looked over at me and said, “I think mom knew that I would be sitting by the air vent right above the table listening, but that doesn’t mean I am not worried about how you both are acting and I don’t know what is going on here,” he walked over towards the phone and picked it up to place it to his ear and then gave a funny look to both of us.

“The phone was acting really funny earlier, so I don’t know what is up with it now,” since I had reserved myself to the fact that Jake really needed to call whoever is manning the Sherriff’s office now that those two twits that used to are gone. I know what I saw earlier with him, but reality changes so quickly that I don’t know what I think I know half the time, and if he is just an innocent bystander now this whole scenario has got to be pretty troubling for him.

“There’s a faint dial tone, but some hallowed out voice telling me to hang up the phone,” Jake looked like he was trying to think and then added as though it just hit him, “it sounds like that guy on the radio when he is talking to the devil you know?”

I immediately blurted out, “Will you just tell the voice to cut the crap and get over here,” which Jake did looking as confused as he has all along. Jake kept the receiver to his ear for another few moments and then set the receiver back on to its base on the wall. I had to ask “What?” as he stood there looking puzzled.

“I don’t know mom, whoever that was started ranting about Quentin Terantino and those stupid Freddy and Jason movies, and how it makes his life nearly impossible now. It didn’t sound like the guy from the radio though when he did it?” he once again grabbed the bat that he had leaned up against the wall, “I’m going back upstairs unless you think I should go to Ricky’s house or something?”

The thought of him going over to Ricky’s house would have been a wonderful one had I not figured that Ricky was probably about as trustworthy to be around as Mary right now. “Go upstairs and close that vent,” I said to him because I actually never had thought of him listening in on it all through there earlier, but it’s nice to let your son think you are smarter than you are in any case. He was most of the way up the stairs from what I could tell when the tapping came at the back door just to the left of me. “Just come in Lou, I have my hands full at the moment.”

The second Lou walked in the door he said very plainly, “You can let go of Mary now, Darius only has her confused, her soul is intact and still going towards the up escalator,” and then he pulled the table off of her ribs using two fingers and very easily moving me with the table. He looked at her deadly serious and stated in a very stern tone, “but you do know more about the word of God and the laws of existence then most, and if you continue on the path that you are walking your soul will end up in my control soon enough. At that time a mere snap of my fingers will eliminate you being a pest pretty damn quick, so if I were you I would think about your own behavior, so hand me the parchment Mary.”

Mary actually did look scared but tried to be strong for a minute. She looked between the two of us and then said, “It flew out of my hand and went under the stove I think,” and my instincts took over to go look under the stove before Lou stopped me. He slid the stove over to the side rather effortlessly and then spied the slip of paper folded up on the floor. It looked a lot different then it had when Mary tried to get me to grab it, and the term “Parchment” fit it much better now as it was indeed very old looking as it lay there. “It has a cross on it so you can’t touch it!” Mary exclaimed to which Lou gave her a puzzled look.

“What is the matter with you?” he said as he stared at her deadly serious, “I’m telling you people, stop watching all of the stupid movies. Hollywood is turning all of your brains into applesauce,” and with that he picked up the piece of parchment and tried to open it up but it acted like it was glued together. “Ha Ha very funny God,” he said as he tossed it to Mary, “Open that up.”

Mary caught the scrap of parchment and then threw it back at Lou, “You can’t make me do anything Lucifer! I am not afraid of you!” which had Lou shaking his head again and staring at her more intently as he threw the slip back at her, and she batted it to the floor.

Lou gave her the most fake smile I had ever seen, and it was almost comical in the way it formed on his face before he said, “Please?” which elicited no response from her again. “So I don’t scare you because you are protected by God and all that yaddita yaddit?” he looked over at me and then started laughing, “Last I checked she didn’t speak Aramaic from the first century and perhaps that part about ‘Lo I walk ye through the valley of death’ crap was really a recipe for cooking pork since it was ok to do that once the Catholics got their hands on the syllabus?” he walked over towards Mary and I could see him starting to get a bit bigger with each step he took until he was within two feet of her and then blared into her face with the voice of a lion on steroids, “WHAT DO YOU THINK NOW?!?!?!?!”

Apparently Mary had not been so acclimated to watching horror movies her whole life because that little trick scared the high holy be Jesus out of her and she immediately started scrambling on the floor like a scared rat to get the parchment, and had it opened and held out in front of her before Lou had even finished roaring. Lou looked at it without taking it from her and then said, “I can’t see it, and you read it to me.”

Mary looked at the piece of Parchment rather peculiarly and then said, “It’s in a language that I don’t understand,” she looked at it again and then said, “I think it’s Aramaic, but then again I can’t read that can I?” and with that she started laughing quite hysterically. The phone started ringing and it startled me while these two were summing each other up, and I was starting to lose my ability to follow their stares at each other. “Get the phone Stacy,” and I found myself picking up the phone to hear the voice of Mary on the other end. This Mary looked right at Lou, “Unlike your creator, you did make a God, and there is nothing you can do to stop me,” and they both vanished. … To be continued