The Slammer – An Ever Growing Web Novel – Chapter 3.4

The third inning of this exciting zero – zero tie finds the Blue Jay’s bottom line up coming out to face the missile launcher that made the power bats of the Blue Jay’s core look rather pathetic. Quite frankly the last four batters in this line up are not very good as the real Achilles’ heel of being the team from Toronto comes shining through. Despite their dominance so far of the American League East a lot of it actually could be great defense and a few shining starts coming into their own. At the end of the line up is where their soft underbelly of being under funded just gleams though. Again like the last batter, people like this can be trouble for Jay at times because he has Major League stuff, and these types of people don’t mind guessing on a non Major League level.

The fact of the matter is that Jay doesn’t know, doesn’t understand and doesn’t care. The only person on the field that knows about his autism is his sister behind the plate, and his total lack of attention to anyone else only adds to how scary he is to batters. On that topic out comes another example of someone who is going nowhere in his career except for that fact that he could easily win a golden glove if it wasn’t fixed at right field. Jose Castilliana also happens to have some serious “temper management” issues that manifest themselves really good when he gets humiliated at the plate. Jay standing 40 feet away from him has humiliated good batters for years, so Lily has a bit of a smirk on her face as she has already figured out what to do with this guy. She holds her pink and her thumb out and shakes her hand.

Without so much as a nod Jay simply pulls the glove up to his chest and holds it there as his fingers play around with the ball inside of it. As his hand grips the ball the proper way for the new bullet in his weapons cache to be used on the enemy, quaking at the plate his shadow looms down towards the batter as the sun is slowly moving out from behind the humongous Coca Cola bottle over the green monster. When the piercing eyes focus towards the point that his attack will be forced inward his knee begins to lift, as the knees of his enemy begin to knock together like something out of an old Bugs Bunny cartoon. As funny as it may appear on the television, in real life it only symbolizes the awe inspiring power of Jay as his arm reaches back to cock the weapon, before the entire body curls over itself for the release that comes hurtling inward towards the plate, as the terrified batter swings purely on a guess at a ball that bounced on the plate about a foot under his bat.

The batter looking up at the scoreboard to see a nine and a nine on the radar gun realized that he just faced the first and most likely last ninety nine mile per hour curve ball of his career. His face curls in on itself as he bites his lip and steadies himself for the next pitch. Lily holds her thumb and her pinky out and shakes her hand again, and after another curve ball that shows a nine and a seven on the radar Castilliana goes mental screaming out at Jay who, of course doesn’t pay attention to him in the least. Lily controls her laughter to the best of her ability and calls another curve ball down but with her fingers in so that Jay knows to take the speed off of it. When Jay’s arm comes over the top it is the exact same motion so the bat of Castilliana lowers with his swing expecting to catch the ball down in the zone only to realize that the ball hadn’t even made it there yet.

In a classic rage that can only remind someone of a 3 year old who didn’t get the type of food he wanted while sitting in his high chair, his bat went flying strait towards the dug out, and almost hit the bat boy, and it was to Lily’s great horror that her oaf of a brother took the time to finally notice something as he started lumbering off of the mound and walking right towards Castilliana who was storming off the field. Castilliana must have noticed this out of the corner of his eye as he turns and starts yelling at Jay menacingly while Jay continues to keep walking towards him, but manages to throw his glove on the ground on the way. The Umpire tells Jay to get back on the mound and his ears are deaf to anything the umpire says so Lily immediately jumps up and gets between the two trying to get her brother back to the mound before he is thrown out of the game. With her hands firmly on his chest Jay stops, as if he realizes that he isn’t going to lumber over his own sister, and then turns around and walks back to the mound picking up his own glove on the way.

Castilliana feeling rather brave now starts yelling things at Jay in Spanish, and finally Jay yells back at him “Vete a la mierda tu gatito,” which Lily had no clue what he said, but Castilliana really hated it and was about ready to charge the mound except he ran right into Lily who practically knocked him over. Yes for those of you who didn’t realize it yet, for some reason Jay knows Spanish and Lily is pretty tough for a broad. The Blue Jays manager practically had Castilliana in a strangle hold by this point when he gets up from Lily’s knock down, but Lily was already walking out to the mound to have a talk with Mr. Personality. She makes it short and sweet, “Shut the fuck up during the game!” and then proceeds to walk back towards home plate, where the next batter is already standing there watching all of this laughing.

“God I don’t think anyone ever said ‘fuck you pussy’ to Castilliana before,” and Lily was at least happy to know what Jay had said and got over the guilt of using the F word on him herself, “Hell the only reason I knew what that meant was because it was his favorite thing to bark out at the rest of us during spring training.” Six strikes later and Jay was looking at 9 strait strike outs to start his Major League career. … to be continued

I think I am going to officially drop it after this one, if the blog doesn’t get deleted, or I don’t lose all of my friends. I have to tell everyone that I don’t actually mind frauds, because some bring great humor to your lives. I have frauds in my friends list that are online to simply have fun because we all know those, and I try to weed out the frauds that are on my friends list that are up to no good. I realize that we all have different opinions of what someone is actually up to when they are online, and I seriously don’t stick my nose into other people’s business as much as I get credit for these days. Sorry if I appear to be too involved in certain things but such is life, and like a lot of you do live my life out both online and offline.

Now it would appear to a lot of people that I am having a tiff with a rather popular fraud on CherryTAP these days and I actually am. You see unfortunately as I said before the advantage of being a fraud is that you can play both sides of the coin to easily, and he has a very bad habit of using his friends to create drama. When he is finished with them he simply makes up stories about them and then gets everyone to hate them, so that he again can look like some insider, out to save everyone from themselves. It’s a typical con game that such wonderful people like L Ron Hubbard, Jim Jones, and many other interesting figures throughout history have perpetrated quite expertly. It isn’t new and nobody is immune from it.

The problem again is that sooner or later the games get harder to play, so you have to make bigger and broader games in order to keep your relevance. Certain people get really hurt when the con men have to resort to complete “scorched earth” tactics to create their drama. I have watch this person completely lie about a few people and even resort to making up stories about how he flew across the country to meet with the most polarizing figure in CherryTAP history just so that he could start more chaos. It doesn’t pass the smell test that for most human beings 3 days is not enough time to go through 3 time zones and then learn all of the magical secrets of someone who is so complex as he is pretending to put it. But then again I imagine that we all have flown completely across the United States in 3 days just to befriend a fallen martyr. Most people would ask to see a picture of the two of you together or something but I guess it’s just too easy. Commence with the drama because that’s more fun anyway.

I want everyone to be clear that I am not actually angry that he posted a blog about me, because at best it was the most childish thing I had ever seen, and really made no sense. A friend took screen caps {because he always posts his idiocy when I am asleep or at work and deletes them before I get up or get home} and it was like watching second graders getting together to “git someone” on a playground only a bit less intelligent. Again I simply wait to see who plays the games with him, wants to come bully me and remove them from the friends list, just like I did before. I am far from perfect, but I know when some things have gotten too outrageous to even be associated with, and I am sorry for the friends that I removed over it, that don’t understand. Playing with frauds that are out to cause trouble will make me the loser every time, they can just create a new personality and start over but this IS my personality so I don’t want to.

As for why I am not bringing names into this, I don’t actually have to because they do all the talking in that regard but before I post this I want to ask anyone reading this a couple of questions. When you see that person creating hell for everyone and acting like a martyr, does it not sometimes appear to just be too much? Has anyone noticed that the fraud calling out the frauds, his brother, and his girlfriend are moving slowly up the legends list while they trash the people above them for being frauds? I actually went and became friends with SweetySuzy because for all the hate that gets thrown at her by these monsters she only just started retaliating and I say, “You Go Gurl!” because it is crap, and just subject changing tactics. I mean, I am actually quite convinced that the new incarnation of the most polarizing figure in CherryTAP history isn’t even that person when I did start poking through their new things the other day. I may be wrong but I am pretty sure that their new “best friend” is just playing a con on everyone again, but what do I know. I’m just a cut rate writer after all ;8o)

P.S. I do have screen caps that I could have used for all of this but I am trying to be above it all, as hard as it is … sorry

The Slammer – An Ever Growing Web Novel – Chapter 3.3

Jay trots out to the mound as he always does for the second inning. It took him 12 pitches to get his three outs in that last inning and considering that not one of the balls was touched by a bat, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize why the next batter walking to the batters box doesn’t have a very happy look on his face. Brett Wilder is an excellent second baseman, who went the entire last year with only 6 errors, which is very good for a second baseman with his range. Usually the second baseman that are fast enough to reach the ball get extra errors because they can reach balls that simply go by other second basemen, but he is that good. Of course his glove skills are what keep him in the league since his batting average lifetime is .199 which is bad at any position. Lily cautiously thinks of what Jay should do because despite what the superstars of the game think, when a pitcher like Jay faces a batter like Brett, strange things happen. Things like hits are what we are talking about because their unorthodox way of handling a bat is exactly what is needed for handling an unorthodox pitcher like Jay. It makes sense when you see it happen.

Lily places two fingers down and then swings them upward to which Jay nods, and places the glove to his chest, with the brim of his hat pointing downward. After glancing inward towards Lily’s glove to pinpoint his positioning, and then starts the slow raising of his knee up towards his chest. Lily could almost smell the fear on the batter as Jay starts stretching his body outward so that his throwing arm reaches strait out towards the outfield seemingly for a mile to the onlookers who have gotten completely silent in the awe of the wingspan of their new mighty hero. The front leg starts lunging forward toward the ground as Jay’s entire body starts wielding forward in the most mechanical fluidity that anyone will ever see again in their lifetime, as his arm begins careening strait over the top of his shoulder in such a blur that most in the crowd can’t even comprehend anything more than the blur. The ball leaves the fingertips of Jay with a last little kiss, as if his own fingernail were to simply change the spin of the ball at the last second, but it’s not like anyone in the crowd would notice, nor has Lily ever known what he does to actually make the ball do what it does, she only know that he does it. The batter doesn’t comprehend anything as he simply swings at the blur screaming at him, as the ball darts strait down towards the actual location of the bat that is swinging around to try and meet it. The ball actually was the perfect cutter, but the lack of comprehension of the batter did indeed allow the head of the bat to hit the ball, which went strait up, and then started drifting back until it ended up on top of the foul screen behind Lily. Brett was more shocked than anyone that he actually touched a 98 mile per hour splitter even if it was a towering foul ball.

With a bit of a different feeling now, Brett starts taking his practice swings with a bit of a grin on his face, as his team mates cheer him on, because they actually think it’s neat to see the ball touched when Jay throws it. Lily simply starts shaking her head because it reminds her of a minor league game from last year, and then she shows Jay the palm of her hand, which makes him nod, and get into his stance with the glove again on his chest and his throwing hand gripping the ball. The wind up that Jay brings himself into looks identical to what he had done in the pitch prior, the arching of the body, the catapult like over arm throw as the ball leaves Jay’s hand, as the ball starts flying toward the plate. The full swing of Brett’s bat almost makes him fall over as he puts everything he has into it, only to hear the smack of the ball in the glove, when the bat has already come full around. He looks up to the scoreboard to see the seven and the six and no other numbers sitting up on the digital radar which actually makes him laugh out loud. “Oh man, did I have that coming,” he mumbled as he placed the bat back on his shoulder for whatever Jay was to be beckoned to throw next.

Lily was also looking up at the digital radar to make sure that her pitcher’s off speed pitch was really dropping, and a twenty two mile per hour drop is the best she had ever seen out of Jay to be honest with herself, but it is also a good sign that your pitcher is on his game. The best pitchers in the league can barely drop fifteen, and that would even include Jack if he wasn’t on his game completely, because the best she saw him do the night before was about eighteen. She holds down one finger and then touches it to the ground, which Jay nods to. Lily is also pretty happy that her brother appears to be more agreeable today then he was in the last outing that she caught for him. This is a big plus because this was not the stage that she wanted him to demonstrate free will.

The brim of Jay’s hat points strait down as the glove comes to his chest. Lily notices the one dead give away for the pitch that Jay is about to throw, that nobody in the big leagues has figured out yet for obvious reasons, but she has known about it from the time he was twelve. He doesn’t look at her glove to set his check point because she has always figured that the amount of attention that he has is all that is required for this pitch. The knee comes up as it always does, looking exactly like it has on every pitch, even Lily can admire how his motion never changes, and that is total hell on an opposing batter as they read “the book” on a pitcher, and other than the one pitch Jay throws that has no “look” there is no “book” on Jay. As his arm outstretches towards center field to attain every ounce of skill and power that mighty Jay Franklin has in him, the leg again starts violently coming down toward the ground to signal the warning that a missile is incoming. The blur of the arm coming over the top, and the hiss as the ball leaves Jay’s fingers is usually the last chance any batter has to steady them enough to even comprehend getting their bat towards the ball. CRACK! “Stteeeeeeeeeeeeriiiiiiiiiike!!!” screams out the umpire, as the ball went strait down the middle of the plate without so much as an offer to swing, and as Brett locks up at the scoreboard on his way to the dugout and spies the one, the zero, and the seven in that order, he realizes why he couldn’t even get the bat off of his shoulder as he watched the pitch end his at bat.

Of course as the career of Brett Wilder goes, another strike out is just a footnote regardless of who threw it. Jay stands emotionless on the mound as he has just thrown fifteen pitches to get the first four strikeouts of his major league career, which happen to coincide with the batters being the first four he has ever faced. The crowd already knows that they are seeing a God like entity on the mound, which will never need another introduction. The fact that they had spent the entire night prior, considering this man’s sister the greatest thing to ever happen to the city of Boston is totally forgotten at this moment, because not only do they have short memories, they get into states of awe really easily as well. Jay doesn’t even acknowledge the next batter coming out to the batters box, which has always made Lily wonder what his mindset is actually like at times like this. Does he know that none of these players walking to the mound really don’t even belong on the same field as him, or does he simply not care that there is even a batter there at all? Lily only thinks of these things for fleeting moments though, as when she is in the park her mind is concentrating on business as well. … to be continued

As the Superdaddyman was furiously working toward solving the worlds problems at his trusty Inter-networked Communications Device {cruising the net for porn … um … ICD} there was a strange set of noises coming from above the Superdaddycave that forced him to don the cape and cowl and speed to the over world! Upon his arrival, and of course allowing his eyes to adjust to that “sunlight” thing people are always talking about, he realized that the noise is commonly referred to by others as “getting along” and of course that scared the Superdaddyman more than the usual fighting and bedlam. The Superdaddyman took great delight in realizing that it was just one of the Terrorist Organization Known as the Evils’s {lil bastards … um … TOKE} assisting one of the other ones with the their nightly indoctrination studies {homework … um … wait yeah homework!} and they both appeared to be fine with it.

Now aside from the normal fear of them actually getting along and everything, it is important to point out that what was most terrifying about the whole process to the Superdaddyman was the roles being portrayed. What most passionate followers of the Superdaddyman {God bless you poor misled sheep} would assume based on their knowledge of the Evils’s ages {Lazius Boycrazius 14 .. Captain ADHD .. 8 .. Imtoocutus .. 6} doesn’t exactly factor into Operation Get Daddyman {lil bastards … oops … OGD} on this occasion or perhaps it factors in more. Greektradgedius Inyiddish had simply walked away from the whole class as 77 years of life have made her un-teachable {oh God trust us on THAT one!} so she went back to watching Wheel of Fortune.

As everyone’s favorite super villain turned super hero watched on with feigned comprehension Captain ADHD had become bored with teaching Lazius Boycrazius algebra and was now working on getting her up to speed with geometry. For the most part the Superdaddyman was forced to just stand there and nod as the graphs and visual aids that Captain ADHD had drawn out on the paper and poster board to demonstrate the error of Lazius Boycrazius’s thinking were written in some sort of alien language to the Superdaddyman. After a half an hour of “refresher classes in geometry” with one of Lazius Boycrazius’s school books he finally did deduce that everything Captain ADHD was drawing out was quite accurate, and of course more scary. Not nearly as scary as the fact that Lazius Boycrazius was taking notes and actually paying attention to him.

The lessons went on for over an hour actually and when it was all over Captain ADHD brought all of the study materials he had created down to the Superdaddycave in hopes that they could be “archived” for when Imtoocutus needs them, as the Superdaddyman had conned him into thinking that he knew it already. Factually speaking his head still hurt just figuring out the first lesson. With that so noted and archived Captain ADHD was back on his computer and rattling away in the dungeon below where he is usually kept. The Superdaddyman after a while stopped what he was doing {back to the porn we know we know} and stealthily crept down to the lair of the fiendish Captain ADHD, who as always had gotten past the parental controls on his computer and was looking through The Library of Congress website for more study materials on something called Trigonometry. {Makes Mental Note .. He sure didn’t get this from his mother so Superdaddyman should try to find a MENSA score for their Postman about 9 years ago}

“Don’t you think you should find some games or something to play?” the Superdaddyman asked as Captain ADHD was hunched over the keyboard fiendishly compiling data on various math techniques. He ignored the question outright which then prompted Superdaddyman to ask it again “Yanno? I installed Real Arcade on there for you?”

“Look dad, I have to get this done before quiet TV. It’s a Fairly Odd Parents special on tonight, and I’d kinda like to see it,” he said in a very waning voice {did I mention lil bastard yet?} and then went on, “if we don’t get her into this we’ll never get rid of her!”

Now keeping in mind it is very hard during times like this for even the strongest of super heroes to keep a strait face, both in laughter and in the concept of sharing the same subconscious thoughts to be fair. Using his keen intellect to assess the situation quickly and come to the appropriate plan of action, the Superdaddyman decided it was best to just walk away and tell him when it is quiet TV time. Who knows, but it’s a lot easier than trying to stifle evil genius at work.

Fast forward to today as the Superdaddyman was at work, and received the super secret communiqué from one of his operatives {The Vice Principal} at the Detention facility of the Big Evil {High School} that there had been an altercation. Big evil had decided to finally deal with the two boys that were harassing her at school, and it appeared to get out of control. The one boy took it upon himself to actually punch one of her friends {yes a girl} and in an instant Lazius Boycrazius became the “Enforcer” of TOKE and from even the description of The Vice Principal went a little too far when the boy was on the ground and she was still beating him over the head with an Arizona Iced Tea bottle. Amusingly enough it was hard to hear any of the usual stern indignation in his voice when he said “God I hate to do this, but the school rules say that she has to be suspended for two days, but we can call today one of them if you come get her now,” and with that the Superdaddyman was off to transport prisoners. The boy didn’t get suspended but in the words of Lazius Boycrazius it’s better for him to have to be pointed at covered in Ice Tea and black and blues all day anyway.

After a short conversation about the incident, and an even shorter drive back to the Casa Di Evils’s the Superdaddyman had deduced that {even if it is amusing, and sounds like she can’t wait to go to school again … funny how that works huh?} she must be punished during her suspension. This works out good for the Superdaddyman {cuz it is all about the Daddyman after all … yeah baby!} for there are a lot of really nasty cleaning chores and other things that he really didn’t want to do anyway. The list was formed, and she was in enough shock over the whole sentencing process that she simply started doing it, when the front door opened above the dungeon. Captain ADHD came charging down the stairs apparently alerted to the news of the suspension from a very big mouthed old lady upstairs, and started right in, “How are you supposed to get better grades if you aren’t even at school huh?” which prompted Lazius Boycrazius to fire something indecipherable back, and it all ended up in a screaming match and I think as I sit here typing this that something fragile just broke. Everything is back to normal again ;8o)

Again we find ourself at the doorway to the Headquarters of the Pink Mafia {PMHQ} where everyone's favorite super villain turned super hero, Superdaddyman embarks on another day of deep cover and infiltration. He is greeted at the door by his most prized Capo who has grave news as it pertains to one of the missions that the Superdaddyman must partake while defending the poor unsuspecting citizenry of Megalopolis from tyranny and despair. The song that simply will not leave the Superdaddyman's mind as he is wandering around aimlessly “You're looking for some dirt .. I'm lifting up my skirt .. I'm searching for a light under me in my purse .. You always think the worst .. I just wanna flirt” rings on no matter what he does. The appropriate Methadone to eradicate this addiction to “Flirt” has not been acquired, so he simply does what most martyrs of our time does and deals with it despite that fact that singing those lyrics makes people wonder a little more than usual.

“There is a tour coming through today, so they need you to get the floors all dry,” was the top secret code that was uttered to the Superdaddyman as his badge swiped the time clock, but his keen intellect de-scrambled that code immediately. For those of you who do not have the amazing code deciphering abilities of the Superdaddyman, it gets translated into this, “The people who buy the asphalt underlayments that we overcharge them for because they are guaranteed to stop any and all leaks are coming in to tour the facility, and you need to mop up all of the rivers that are forming on the floors from the 7 bazillion leaks in OUR roof!” This is common practice whenever there is snow on the roof, after all, so it is a 3 or 4 times a year event. Some crime families make the bodies disappear, this one simply eliminates evidence. No matter, since the Superdaddyman is after all a trained professional!

Of course this has to come after the Superdaddyman goes across to PMHQ North to scrub the dirt out from under the toilets. There had been a lot of complaints about it and the Superdaddyman was clueless as to what they were talking about until he got across the street and got down on his hands and knees in front of the toilet and could barely see dirt under the bowl. It was apparent that the Upper Godfather types of the Pink Mafia must have had one of “those” types of parties over the weekend which led to time spent on their hands and knees in front of the toilet. Mind you, that you don't have to be a Caped Pervader to realize that it perhaps isn't a great idea to let on that you were kneeling in front of the toilet enough to notice minute traces of dirt, but as the Superdaddyman was forced to lay down on the floor with his head under the toilet bowl to really scope out the situation, he realized there are far worse things to admit! “You found me on my knees .. Next thing you're saying "tease" .. I'm trying to find my phone and my keys, not your sleaze .. My spell is like a curse .. I just wanna flirt” .. Oh God kill me with that f*cking song!

With the underneath of the Royal Thrones scrubbed and polished it was back to PMHQ Southern to start on the never ending quest to keep floors that are basically being rained on dry, and try to conceive of a plan to at least make the place look like the products we make work, for the love of God. This is nearly impossible with the blaring noise of the Pussycat Dolls also filling the crowded space between the Superdaddyman’s ears. Feeble attempts to mop even the smallest of areas is filling mop bucket upon mop bucket as the rivers had been forming for days and the constant “drip .. drip .. drip .. drip” wasn't going anywhere until the 3 feet of snow on the roof was completely gone anyway. That was when it hit the Superdaddyman like that skirt the one bank teller wears even in the snow! What we need to do here is take the mark lift up into the rafters and wire the asphalt pails underneath the drips! It would take at least 48 hours to fill one of those and that would buy us the time necessary to get past the impending tour.

After getting up off the floor, from an unfortunate balance and wet floor issue we almost overlooked, {damn honesty} the Superdaddyman made his way out to the machine shop to get the scissor lift from the locked storage area. As most of you know, the Superdaddyman had lost his “key privileges” due to a misunderstanding that involved a welder and a set of chair wheels, but the Superdaddyman has since learned how to pick that lock with a paper clip. Since nobody actually talks to each other in a mob environment and simply plots against each other everyone simply assumes that someone else gave the Superdaddyman a key. What fun would it be to tell them all the truth anyway? The keys to the scissor lift were left on the deck of it like they always are so the Superdaddyman was off and running. The lyrics in his head instantly changed too! “Get your motor runnin' .. Head out on the highway .. Lookin' for adventure .. And whatever comes our way .. Yeah Darlin' go make it happen .. Take the world in a love embrace .. Fire all of your guns at once .. And explode into space” and it never ceases to amaze even the Superdaddyman how impressionable and easily amused he actually is. We are after all talking about 3 mph of adrenaline pumping machinery here as the Superdaddyman drives past everyone doing the Princess Diana wave, and getting the Massachusetts State Bird thrown back at him.

Under the first good sized leak the Superdaddyman gets the first bucket secured using bailing wire, but the “ping .. ping .. ping .. ping” echoes throughout the whole plant. This isn't exactly a good thing either so the Superdaddyman starts thinking about what he should do to deaden the noise to which he hadn't thought of {you try and be a Super Hero and see how well YOU keep up damnit!} and his eyes spotted the rolls of waste material. “Aha! That's just what needs to be in the bottom of these buckets!” the Superdaddyman thought to himself and all around could tell by the sound of Pop Rocks and Pepsi coming from the Superdaddybrain. The trust tin snips come out and pieces of fabric are mad bucket sized as the Superdaddyman continued to load up all the buckets around the warehouse. He went back to the original bucket to see how much water it had accumulated as the “ping .. ping .. ping .. ping” had long since subsided, while his trusty Capo had most of the floor at least looking washed as apposed to flooded.

At the original location of the plan, the Superdaddyman looks inside of the 5 gallon bucket to see about a half a gallon of water in it. It probably won't last the night, but the Superdaddyman concedes that it will at least last long enough to get that tour through here. If it doesn't then it comes to an issue of not fixing the damn roof to begin with, and at least the Superdaddyman tried. He was staring into the bucket wondering if he should dump it just so that it would have another couple of hours of life in it as it is the fastest leak, and that was when the diabolical Paco Taco was walking by fresh off of a visit to the Smoke Shack. Decision made, as we still have a bit of a Talc payback to deal with .. Muahahahaha ;8o)

I remember when I first came around CherryTAP and thought the place was just amazing. I believed that I had found online Nirvana and in a lot of ways I still believe that I have, but a lot of things have changed the more jaded I become. I happen to be a big supporter of the theory that this is an adult site and we should all act like adults but rarely do a lot of people, and simply expecting everyone to have their own personal “where with all” to deal with the cons and the cheats is often infantile on my own behalf as well. Some people just don't have it in them and that is perfectly ok, because there are so many times that if I had my own way, I would simply go back to being a know nothing with wide eyes and fascination about everything but I can't and that is my cross to bare. It also doesn't mean that I should always sit back and take pleasure in watching others get conned either and for that I apologize. I am not a super hero as I portray in a lot of my comedic writings but I do care enough to want to simply say something on something that is totally none of my business.

I remember the first time I saw “Golden always rates her friends” scroll across the top of the screen, and I went to check out her page. Thought it was cool for the most part what she did for her kid, rated her, added her as a friend, went through a bunch of her photos, and on to the next profile. Whoever that person is never came back and rated me, so I did remove that person from my list about 2 weeks later because the name implied con artist the more I saw it. No big deal, but I started seeing the name changing and the other things “Want Points Fast?” and of course those amazingly self serving bulletins about the contests and all made me start to take notice because this person was an outright fraud and to be honest with everyone, I like to see a good train wreck now and again especially when it involved so many people that had no concept of the obvious. It wasn't until I had my first happy hour {which was the first user sponsored Happy Hour, so it was pretty huge} that I finally saw that whatever {it} on my page for the first time.

While everyone was bombing the crap out of my page and my photos and everything I followed around that person and saw that he/she/it {who again, came to my page and didn't rate anything} was skimming people. By simply grabbing on to the people who sent gifts and commented “thank you” for the Happy Hour etc it was running another one of it's cons to get people who easily displayed “gratitude” for things. It was after all it’s MO to make people believe that it was doing them a favor all the time. The con game continued as I checked with other “good” friends that had Happy Hours and again, they all had the same experience, as did I again when I had my last one that Saturday morning so that I could simply be an ass and post “Just Whoring Points Thank You” as my Happy Hour message. I had started actually paying attention to it assuming that it was up to no good whatsoever and I told anyone that I was close to that it was simply out to do something wicked, but I never really said anything otherwise.

During that period when it started playing the whole “My boyfriend, My husband, My pregnancy, My loss” crap which had gone through a whirlwind of illiterate messages, cons, games, and talking about how great it was to allow you all to rate it's photos. I started making that page a part of my daily rounds simply because I wanted to watch the inevitable “train wreck” as all of it's promises just couldn't be fulfilled and I am sorry to all of the people that got screwed in it's last contest, but again I have to say lesson learned to you all I hope. I had blocked it the day after my Happy Hour anyway so it can't simply eliminate me and my speech, but when the fit hit the shan and everyone was posting the wah wah bulletins, I couldn't help but find humor in the lack of obvious again. I still want to just get on the floor and roll back and forth as people are mourning the loss of her imaginary baby that came up in an amazing case of “Operation Change The Subject” that conveniently happened after the big scandal with it's contest. Again the sheep follow the lead.

Well I continue to monitor the page when I realize that the name has changed again to “The Blog That Will Change CherryTAP Forever” and my mind did immediately think “Oh Goodie” she's going to make idiots out of a lot of people again and I can watch it .. Yeehaw!” while finding amusement over it's image changing to some movie characters from Lara Croft or something, who knows, who cares? I had been following the blogs because it was hilarious watching it now be the boyfriend or whatever shouting people down one day and then sicky sweet the next, and I also placed the page in my bookmarks because I didn't want to miss my seat to this one. I had a lot of I told you so's to dispense when the great plot finally unfolded. Don't get me wrong I had been warning important peeps for a while, but after all I am just a pawn in the great CherryChess board like the rest of you, so when the blog came out Pimping Out some total knock off of CherryTAP I actually was laughing my balls off here. Falls under the heading of “Order Shit Eat Shit” really because I actually had thought all along that it was some sort of scheme by Golden Palace to funnel out CherryTAP users, and apparently I was more on the money then I had thought.

I did of course alert one of the Bouncers that I was close to and it was eliminated but not after I took my screen caps of it all. If there is one thing you learn in the CherryTAP world you screen cap everything, if only so you have proof when a total fraud {like say an Owl} happens to accidentally leave screencaps of you that end up in bulletins. Once that went down and everyone was all proud of getting it quickly I went back to look again because I knew that it would take another stab at it, and sure enough there it was again. More screen caps for me, another bouncer deletes, and I guess one of the Yellow People finally got involved because realistically only the Yellow people can do most of the things that bouncers get blamed for. The site itself wasn't ready for prime time quite yet but they had to strike while the iron was hot because the bridges into that fraud's island are burning into the water a little fast huh? I knew when it had finally gotten it's warning from the Yellow person because the entire page changed completely. Innocent looking little “Golden” was displayed in the profile picture again and “Need Fast Point's Blah Blah Blah” was the name again.

Most people never knew it happened, and thank God most don't care, but I wanted to make a few observations here while I may that might make a few people think about it all, and others it will piss off. While the Yellow People are deciding what features of CherryTAP will get fixed, and what ones won't. Who gets salutes and who doesn't {because lets get one thing perfectly strait here, this is one of several total frauds on this site that do NOT have legitimate salutes but are allowed to be above the rest and the Yellow people know it} who gets to be purple and who doesn't {because if you pay attention people get swapped vicariously over to different referrers and the day I log in and see that I was spontaneously put under a porn star as my referrer I am going to be furious} and until they actually use the resources that they have to rectify their own crap {like they know who's name is on the credit cards of the frauds for their VICs, blasts etc, or at least their Paypal records} then I am fiddling while Rome burns. I still have my friends, and I still have my fun around here, but the con men are going to get every last one of you if you don’t pay attention.

Why do I bring all of this up now? Many people may be asking because it would appear to be water under the bridge at best, but there is a simple solution to all of it. As I watched the most foolish crap happen throughout the bulletins all weekend involving different frauds that are still very much out there, still very much out to get anyone, and there are new ones coming in here every day, that people need to know what makes CherryTAP suck, and learn to avoid it. I like to believe that most of my friends have, but just in case here’s a bit of a reminder, as I see up in the Cherry Spotlight a person who spent a whopping 1.4 million Cherry Bucks to simply try to get that last 20,000 or so points it takes to get out from the stigma of being a target {as in #1}, and then wait for a new crop of sheep to lead over the fence. It reminds me of that old saying “She was so ugly that she had to put peanut butter on herself to get the dog to play with her,” but also want to remind you of something I said the other day. Frauds don’t have to worry about the ramifications of what they do because they never lost their own credibility, they stole yours. They can simply start over as someone else, and you are finished as you. Don’t play with them, don’t call them out, don’t think you are helping them to change the world, because you are only being led at all times. If you think you can beat them at their own game, don’t forget that the only reward is that they become a different character and not the original one. ;8o)