Livin' With Evils's - Volume 16

So I go through the state of stumbling, fumbling to get my clothes together, and hopefully prepare for a horrible night at work, reach into the freezer, get an Ice Pack, tucked into the back of my pants {for my back not my erection you perverts}, and I start racing up the stairs to grab coffee, and maybe a little food. I am greeted by a 5 year old in her Barbie pajama’s eating a bowl of cereal, and now I am about to yell at the evil 70 something year old for again giving the kids whatever the hell they want for dinner when I notice that evil 70 something year old dressed in her robes also. Somewhere between yelling at her, for this, and realizing that I am such an idiot, I decide to ask “Is it still morning?” which makes everyone in the general vicinity break into their “Daddy is Silly” laughs that usually make it easier for me to sneak away and crawl back into my cave downstairs.

Ok then so now I am totally dressed, showered and ready to do nothing for the next 11 hours, so I figured that I would start on a few of the blogs that I never get around to anymore, because of my life being so out of control. About 3 blogs in I am exhausted again, and {surprise surprise} horny. I decide to simply start writing out a few notes, when the daughter comes downstairs {not the super cute one, in her Barbie pajama’s but the super evil one with all the excuses} and she is facing me with another dilemma, which as usual is my fault and not her own. Ok so she had apparently lost something I was supposed to sign, and she doesn’t exactly know what it is, but it was in the pile of stuff in her room that she forced me to throw away, as I had promised, while she was gone. I told her to clean her room {damnit} or else I was going in there with garbage bags. She didn’t, I did, and that is how it works in this house {damnit} so she figured it was a wonderful opportunity to use it to her advantage. I didn’t fall for this one, what I did was I created a new document on my desktop for occasions like this. I then signed it and sent it on her way with her, and I was back to bed, after realizing that perhaps I have needed the sleep more than the popularity these days. Here’s a copy of the letter I have saved on my computer if any other parents find it useful, then please feel free to steal it, those that find it offensive, then please fuck off, and be offended by that instead ~winks~

To whom it may concern …

I am sending you a copy of the generic note that I now have saved on my computer for times like these. This is probably regarding Big Evil, as she has somehow lost the note I was supposed to sign, and I probably haven’t gotten the correct story as to what was supposed to be signed, so I am bringing it to your attention this way, as to make it known that I have NOT signed a permission slip for anything, and I have not actually been up to date on what it is I am signing anyway. If this note is actually for Middle Evil, or Little Evil, please accept my apologies as I am becoming a trained professional at this …

Reason for losing said “Daddy must sign Document” this time …. Excuse from Daughter goes HERE

Please accept my apologies and as always if this is an actual important event I would appreciate a phone call at {603} 555-1212 with any details of said ramifications of what I supposedly just signed, or involvement I was supposed to have in the education of my child. I apologize and I hope that you understand.

Signed …. Superdaddyman {and yeah it is an indecipherable squiggle}

______________________________ date _____________

Kids … ya gotta love em!